Tag Archives: government

Why is there no in between sane and not sane?


Recently a friend of mine was feeling off. She called her therapist and after speaking with her therapist it was decided she should go to the mental health hospital. She was not suicidal. She was sent away. She was essentially sent away because she was not suicidal so therefore fine. We were discussing how this is so vastly unfair. Further reflection led me to say, “This only goes to further feed the mental health stigma. You are either sane or not sane. There is no in between.” I know most of that boils down to funding. I am not finding fault with the mental health hospital itself. It is the system. It needs to start from the highest level. Government needs to start stating openly, mental health is just as important as physical health.

When I worked in probation I saw how broken the system was. I saw how many probationers were really mental health clients that could not receive help. Most often I heard they will give me medications but they won’t give me therapy. This in turns fuels the stigma that there is a “magic” pill that fixes the mental imbalance. While medications are part of the answer. They are not the only answer.

Mental health tends to be more like a puzzle. The problem is it is not just one puzzle. It is a puzzle based on each individual. Finding out how that person’s puzzle can be put back together , is the hard part. It also doesn’t help that you can’t glue the puzzle together so it stays together. It can and often does fall apart and has to be reconfigured. This makes it frustrating not only to the Doctor treating it but, also the person dealing with it. It is easy for the person dealing with the mental health issue to think there is nothing wrong. The system really does encourage that. I know this all too well.

I am estranged from my Mother and youngest sister. I  had already been in therapy for  four years by the time the ties were cut. When it was pointed out that I was relying on medication in order for me to deal with this situation I knew something had to be done. If nothing else this showed me how toxic it was for me. Not just emotionally, physically as well. No medication is completely side effect free.  I had chronic pain issues on top of this. My kidneys and liver were not happy.  Where as physical abuse is so much more obvious, Emotional abuse is much more subtle. Verbal abuse as well. We tend to tolerate a lot more from close friends and family than we ever would others. It came time though for me to love myself more. I am not going to get into the specifics. It is not for public consumption. The details don’t really matter to others.I often reflect on the situation. I do hear things here and there. What I hear still convinces me it was the right decision. We need to realize that emotional physical verbal and social all tie together in our health. They can not be out of balance.

Three years later and my kidneys and liver are back within normal ranges. I am on much less medication. I am aware I won’t get completely medication free. I understand it is a chemical imbalance in part. I am also completely okay with the fact that I will probably be in and out of therapy for the rest of my life. I don’t understand so much of the stigma around admitting to a mental illness. I don’t understand admitting an imbalance and working to improve that imbalance being a weakness. It is something that has to start from the top levels of our government AND from the bottom level of every day interactions with people. It is way past time for us to realize this.

I struggled with this when I was on medicaid and dependent on the system for my mental health care. Luckily I had years of private insurance therapy first. I knew what I did need and what I didn’t. Still they tried over medicating me. I won’t lie, I did go along with it for a bit. It took me a while to realize that over medicating is just as bad as under medicating. It is a balance. The problem is when you are in the middle of psychosis and are over medicated, it is really hard to realize that.  It is easy to see why people go off medication. Over medication made me feel like a zombie. It increased my brain fog. It made my mood swings even more unpredictable.  I was lucky that we were able to get back on insurance. I was lucky that I found a physician who listened to me. Who was willing to fine tune medications to the right mixture.  Having gone through the medicaid system I know how hard it is. I understand how broken the system is.  I had to go off all my medications for two months because I was not suicidal. They didn’t know how long it would take me to get through the waiting list. I was just needing maintenance.  The problem is if medication is part of your maintenance and you are denied that medication, you are no longer maintaining.

We need to fix our broken system in all the areas, not just physical health. We need to let people know there IS an in between. There is a work in progress level. That mental health is so much more than sane and not sane.


We give thanks for freedom


Today is Veteran’s Day , a day we stop and think and thank a Veteran of a war that gave us the freedoms we DO have. Ones that sometimes in our First World minds seem like not such a big deal.


(Jenni Sent- My Dad and Mom with my son.)

Facebook is full of  both Republicans and Democrats criticizing the government.  Do these people realize that just being able to post that kind of stuff on Facebook is a freedom that they have. One that others do not have. One that others if they did so could be killed. Their family killed as well.

Facebook has all sides of religion on it. There is no state chosen religion. We have the right to believe what we want to believe. Its a FREEDOM that we have not earned but was fought for us.

Facebook its self is a right that we have. The right to free speech. People died to give us this right.


(Cece sent in this one of her Mom and Dad)

The right to bear arms, whether you agree with it or not, was a right that was fought and paid for by the blood of others.

The right to own private property….The right to not house soldiers in your home when you don’t want to….The right to JUSTICE itself was fought for. Some fought with every breath they had.


(A good friend of mine, James Watkins, Received 2 Purple Hearts. He was wounded in Vietnam twice and won many other awards. He promised God if he got him out of that hole he would devote his life to him. He has been a preacher since 1972)

Some of those brave men and women went above the call of duty. Not only were they fighting for our freedoms but they also did their best to show compassion, bravery, and common decency even if it was towards the enemy.


(Ashley sent- My husband E5 Sargent Daniel Craft)

Some left loved ones behind this is not something that happened in years past. This is something that still happens every day. These people  believe in these rights and make daily sacrifices for these rights.


(My nephew , Cameron Craft in  Daniel Crafts uniform)

Its not always with their lives. Sometimes its sacrificing time and memories that they can’t get back. Time and memories they were not there for. True now there is technology but births via skype or recordings or pictures. They were not there in person.


(Ashley sent- E5 Sargent -Daniel Craft. Marine, Currently deployed)

I know the rights and freedoms may not be the same for the other countries that fought and still do fight. I do know though that their sacrifice is just as great. Just as big and just as hard.



(Marines carrying the flag in Fourth of July parade , Temecula CA)

We give you Honor. We give you Thanks.


(Kari sent- My brother in law, Patrick.)

We can’t thank you enough.


(Kari sent- my brother William and my daughter)

We are humbled by your sacrifice.


(Mattie sent-That’s my Pa. He served in the Navy before meeting his beautiful wife, Granny and going on to have seven children, twenty-one grandchildren, and we have lost count of the great grandchildren… Sadly, he passed away when I was in the seventh grade. One of the greatest men I have ever known.)

We are safe because you fight. Whether it was for your country or not did not matter. Injustice was being done and that was all that mattered.


(Susan Miller sent this-Clifford Allen – was my mum’s oldest brother – the uncle I never got to meet. He flew for his country with the RAF, married and died just six weeks later when his plane crashed on 3rd September 1945. He was just 20 yrs old. Armistice Day is for men [and women] like this … and their families. God Bless you all …)

We are able to feel safe because you serve without regard to your own needs and desires.


(Stacia sent- SSG Jobie Langston and our daughter)

Some gave everything they had.


(Amber sent- my grandfather, Ron Roylance. He is my father’s stepfather but was the only grandfather I really knew and was close to. He served in the Navy during the Korean war.  He passed away this past January.  He is pictured with my niece, Ashlee.)

We are proud of you.


(Amber sent- my father, Bryant. He also served in the navy but never saw any combat.  He is pictured with my sister, Heather.)

We support you.


(Amber sent-aternal grandfather, Nyle Davis’, footstone. He served in the Army during the Korean War.  He passed away 20 years ago this coming New Years Eve.)

We are the home of the BRAVE.  Our Freedom is all the more special because of your sacrifice!

THANK YOU just doesn’t seem enough.

We will not forget! We will not forget! We will not forget!