It is okay to not always like being a parent.
puke, snot, poop, pee. The first time my daughter had projectile vomit I was sure It was a Rosemary’s baby all over again, in real life. At first you get all grossed out. Then its like no big deal. The next thing you know they start making the face and you just hold out your hand. Then you look at the puke in your hand and wonder how the hell you got to this point. My daughter had ear tubes in. No one told me when they do drain it is often the nastiest green yellow caked on dried snot look and it would be all down her ear,check and neck , on her pillow on her blanket. on her pj’s. Seriously the first time I saw that, I puked myself. Poop it should just stay in the diaper. I am good with it in the diaper. The gagging issues start when it’s up the back in the belly button on the floor, down the chair. I can’t tell you how many times I would go to hand off my daughter and realize the poop was out. Often it was all over me and her and the blanket I had around her. Seriously? Is that why you suddenly were so happy and chatty. I now look at babies with suspicion when they are happy and chatty suddenly.
Nuclear meltdowns of epic proportions over the smallest things. ” I don’t want that goldfish I want the one you put back in the container. Don’t even try to tell them there is no difference. It’s minute goldfish details and they know. THEY KNOW! They ask for the pink sippy cup. You give them the pink sippy cup. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO Not THAT pink sippy cup, the other one. The other one is purple, maybe fuscia. Oh you wanted the dark pink cup. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO the pink cup!
Feeding them. Balanced meals? No thank you. Odd assortments of food. SURE! Yogurt and empty hamburger buns coming right up. I found myself going between she is eating…and feeling guilty it wasn’t balanced. For awhile I just shrugged my shoulders and gave her a multivitamin. That should hold her. Then the I want one food and only one food for all three meals and possibly snack too. You want Peanut butter and Jelly daily. FIne. lets add some fruit. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO how about a few carrots. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO then twenty minutes after eating the sandwich. I am still hungry can I have another one. Then once you get the gist , I started making them ahead. Which was exactly when she no longer WANTED that for lunch or dinner anymore. So I have four neatly stacked Peanut butter and jelly sandwiches ready to go. Then it was Mac and cheese. Don’t you dare suggest adding hot dogs or ham or heaven for bid PEAS! What are you insane? Then they start eating a little better. So you make one of the family favorites. “I don’t like it”
Waking up in the middle of the night, multiple times, and god awful early waking. Singing should be banned before nine am. Then if they do actually sleep. YOU wake up and realize they are still sleeping. SOMETHING MUST BE WRONG. The next step is they sleep several nights in a row so you feel fairly sure you are going to sleep. NOPE! Tonight they woke up five times. Then there is the they have slept through the night for like over a month. You need to get a good night sleep tonight because REASONS. Nope, they wake up four times!
Clothes. You have to wear them. Sometimes you have to be a mind reader to know what they want to wear. It is always not what they want to wear when you don’t have the time. My daughter was set on dresses. I am mostly a tomboy. I don’t like dresses. My first thought was why would you want to wear a dress. I could not dissuade her. Then we had issues with matching. Truthfully we still do. I got to the point that I was just like I am okay with it if you are. No you can’t wear ballet flats to Physical education. No you can not wear flip-flops on our hike. She is now getting into the preteen stuff of not wanting to change clothes. I don’t care I like this shirt. Your shirt has awful BO and stains all over it. I don’t care. Change your shirt. Which is met with stomping and whining.
When they behave and act like little people. Even though you are staring at them sure they have been abducted by aliens. Maybe some of that begging and pleading and telling and talking is actually paying off. I have tried the bribing them to behave. I will take you for ice cream if you behave nicely in the bank. What? Oh yes that kid? The one standing on the table with the lollipop. Nope I don’t know her. The one who just picked said lollipop up off the carpet and popped it in her mouth? Yeah that ones mine. Germs are good for you. There are times though that she catches me off guard. We go into Verizon Wireless and she sits in the corner on my phone or hubbys phone whichever one is not acting up.
Random I love you’s and I need a hug. I mean, yeah just kick me right in the heart would you. The random run up and throw their arms around you and squeeze with all their might. Sure it might take you by surprise but you smile. It just has this magic that takes you out of whatever mood you were in and upgrades your mood.
When they are sleeping. I can’t help it. I can’t stay mad at her. I just melt when I see her sleeping. She just looks so angelic. It’s a lie I know but still. I kinda like the pretty lies. I can stare at her and wonder. I can sneak up next to her and sniff her and feel her mostly still soft skin.
When they are a little older, they come home and tell you about a situation that happened at school. They chose the right answer to the problem and your heart bursts over with pride. Recently it was over a bully situation and she handled it well and with just a touch of sass. Hey some of those talks are getting through.
They become more and more independent. I mean what is not to like? Don’t like dinner? Make yourself PBJ. They get up super early. Get some cereal watch tv and leave me alone! The sucky part of this is, you wish they still needed you for things. Maybe not at the crack of dawn but later when you think about how much they can do now. It is a soft stab in the heart.
Basically , It’s worth it. It is just not always fun , or what we thought it would be. But it’s worth it.