Sometimes depression comes in slowly.
Ever so slowly going from white clouds to light grey.
Slowly the light silverish grey turns to dark grey clouds, billowing bigger and bigger.
Before you know it they are out and out black. Deep and dark and you have no idea how it happened so quickly.
It is really sneaky that way.
There are other times though, that its like a solid wall of black just slams into you.
No warning.
In the end though I have great friends who just know. The perfectly timed text or even a share on Facebook to my wall.
Frequent comments on my Ten Things of Thankful posts, which keep me going back to the blog hop. Keeps me going back to the positive.
I didn’t do my writing every day this week. I tried and it just wasn’t working. Sometimes I forget that little steps are still steps. Progress is progress. The fact that I can even look back and see the progress: priceless.
Sunday
1. One of my daughters friends from school came to church. She was really excited about it. When I picked her up from Sunday class I was really touched by their chalice they had set up.
2. It may have taken me nine years but I got a second picture with that pissed off look. The funny thing is… neither time did I mean to capture that expression. It just happened.
Monday
3. I was published again and it seems to be a subject a lot of people relate to, having only one child.
4. For beautiful sunrises.
Tuesday
5. Perfect Pomegranate. Even if I ate so much I upset my stomach. Worth it.
6. I got my four mile walk in with my friend. I definitely felt it but it feels good to stay on track.
Wednesday
7. Autumn Squash soup is back.. My lunch date was not to sure what to think about this eating thing Auntie Erin was doing. Thankful for friends who let me spoil there kids with snuggles.
Thursday
8. Play time with Princess P and catching up with her Mom. Even if she did sit on my purse and pee on it. Potty training. What can you do.
9. Thankful for friends who also spoil my kid. Even if she has her own sense of fashion. The shirt looks amazing on her.
Friday
10. For a great Friday Frozen Yogurt trip……. and the priceless perfectly timed two year old declaration of YUCK! Followed by the same two year old little parrot who said I got mommys in the cutest voice!
chronicallysickmanicmother 
I love it when I catch glimpses of my kids younger selves in their expressions. You did a great job with those photos! My pomegranates are ripe, now. It seems like they ripened earlier than usual this year. I need to get them harvested and frozen.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks! Yes I thought it was a tad early for Pomegranates not that I was complaining though
LikeLike
Your poem was haunting and beautiful and spot on description. I’m happy that the TTOT link up keeps you (and me) trying to see life through gratitudinal (Clark’s word) perspectacles. Your list is wonderful. I love me some butternut squash soup.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you!. mmmmm Squash
LikeLike
I understand about depression….you don’t even realize that you’re sinking in sometimes! And we here on this little hop will always be here for you.
LikeLike
And, I’m a pomegranate and yoghurt fan too!
LikeLike
Thank you!
LikeLike
Pingback: Silver grey black and white Ten Things of Thank...
Depression can indeed sneak up on you and all of a sudden you’re thinking, “where the heck did that come from??” I remember that all too well. Positive thoughts to you, friend.
Love the pic of your daughter’s faces – how hysterical! Funny to see their baby selves in their big girl selves, isn’t it? How old is your daughter? My Kidzilla is six…going on sixteen!
Love pomegranate. Yes!
I’m going to read your post about one child now…I have a feeling I’m going to relate to that all too well.
Have a great week!
LikeLike
She is nine also going on sixteen.. The attitude oh the attitude it kills me.
Thanks!
LikeLike
I think you’re doing an amazing job to participate so fully when you are feeling so down. This was a great list!
LikeLike
It is easier if I sit at the end of the day and think of one or two things. It is also easier the busier I am. When I am home… its harder
LikeLike
Great list! I can relate to the depression thing. Mine has been coming on slowly, I’m fighting it and trying not to go back on anti-depressants. I HATE the side effects. I haven’t found one yet that was worth the side effects. I go back to the doctor Monday, so we’ll see what comes of that.
Those “mad face” pictures are priceless, and totally not how she normally looks! Too funny.
Princess P is getting SO BIG, oh my!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Have you tried self hypnosis… there are some good ones on youtube.
And I am so in denial how big Princess P is getting
LikeLike
Sorry to hear about the depression. That really sucks. And what else really sucks is how many people in your comments section relate on a very personal level. I guess there’s a reason we all write, and a reason we all engage with Thankful posts. *sigh* I hope those clouds go away soon.
BUT the walking is really good, and the snuggles with other people’s kids. Well done for this list 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you. Yes writing is a great form of therapy.
LikeLike
So sorry to hear about the depression. It’s a funny (not haha) thing – and one that I think we don’t recognize when it’s happening…it’s only later that (for me) I think “OH! Life feels good again!” Ugh. And I love love love your daughter’s shirt and fashion sense.
LikeLike
It has been something I have battled for a long time now and I expect the highs and lows. It doesn’t make it any easier though.
She is totally going to rock fashion to its toes!
LikeLike
nice list…. not just for the content, but for the simple, direct and straightforward list of things that make up your world. My goal is to be able to do a post like this.
…and nice work in staying with the TToT, does not always seem to be doing any good…over time it totally does
LikeLike
Thanks. This way seems to work the best for me.
And I agree it does do good.
LikeLike
Your wonderful photos make me smile. Especially, the children are adorable. 🙂
LikeLike
Aw thank you!
LikeLike
Oh how well I know about depression and how nice it is to come out of that dark place. Loved your poem and all of your pictures.
LikeLike
Thank you
LikeLike
Those pictures of your daughter are priceless! What a scowl she had in that newborn picture! Hope it doesn’t take you 9 years to catch another one of those funny looks!
PRINCESS P SAT ON YOUR PURSE AND PEED ON IT?! I do love that story!
LikeLike
She surely did .. The funny thing is her nickname was because her first name starts with a p….But now it has a whole new meaning! bwahahahaha
I have to capture more pictures like that…..you know for her wedding day! bwahahahaha
LikeLike
Most excellent, writing and posting.
I love the pics of your daughter! It was worth 9 years to wait – you captured the looks perfectly! One day your daughter will sit with you while you tell her the story about taking that last picture:)
The walking thing is important. So happy to hear you are still persisiting.
I truly believe that with each baby step forward it is still a step forward. And that is the key. That is the goal.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you. Small steps still count I always say.
LikeLike
The look on your daughter’s face! LOl I wonder what it takes to make her give the look! Congratulations on getting published! I can relate to the post because my son was an “only child” for 6 years before his sister came along.Now that the little girl is 3yo, I am so with you on seeing the beauty of being able to hand a baby back to the mom when things get yucky LOL.
LikeLike
The pictures are too cute and I am sorry about your peed on purse. Time to shop for a new one!
LikeLike
Oh how my heart aches for you- and so many others who have to endure darkness of depression… I’m so sorry.
You surely embraced the good and the light in this list…
Those mad pics are hilarious! I love the sunset and the beautiful moments you were able to take in.
LikeLike
Thank you. I am totally holding those pictures for her wedding day.
LikeLike