The view from the bottom.


NaBloPoMo October 2013

Wednesday, October 16, 2013
Oprah Winfrey said, “So go ahead. Fall down. The world looks different from the ground.” Do you embrace failure?


Oh my dear stalkers, I so do. The only way to find what works sometimes is to find out what does not work. What absolutely completely and totally does not work.

Its hard to realize failure can help us. Its hard to see that the sixth medication to fail to offer any help is just another stepping stone to finding what works for you.

It was not too long ago that if I was presented with the way I live now was presented to me. I would absolutely have seen it as a failure.

There is a quote that I absolutely love and when I am struggling it helps me see the light.


Its not until I look at what I do have now, what I have time to appreciate now, that I didn’t then. That I can see it was not failure.

I FAILED in being a woman in the work force.

I FAILED in being a working mother.

I FAILED in being a wife that has a job away from home.

In many ways I FAILED in being a daughter since my relationship with my mother is broken.

I way way way FAILED at being the wife and mother who can cook.

Some days I FAILED at functioning.

I could look at it that way. I could just stay down. I could just give up.

That’s not me though.

So maybe I didn’t FAIL at being a woman in the work force, maybe that was not meant for me.

Maybe I didn’t FAIL at being a working mother, maybe I just need to be a mother.

Maybe I didn’t FAIL at having a job away from home, my job now is to help my friends when and where I can.

Maybe I didn’t FAIL at being a daughter. Maybe it is a two sided problem with no easy answers and we are each doing what we need to do for OURSELVES.

Maybe I didn’t FAIL at Cooking…okay..I take that back..I really really suck at it. But perhaps maybe thats why I married a man who CAN cook.

I don’t agree with the word failure.  I embrace things that didn’t work out for me and my life and we move on from there.

I think as women and even men that we take failure as only a negative thing. Its not.

Its not easy to say, “So it didn’t work we will try something else.” Its frustrating . It incites anger.  It brings sadness. Its disappointing.

Take that time. Let the emotions come. Then take a deep breathe. Look at those stars and say, “What do we try next?”  “What is the next step?”

Maybe when these emotions are flowing, remember this about courage…..


For some reason , I don’t really know why, I always seem to just roll over after being knocked down and see a different perspective. Maybe not right away. Maybe not the next day.  It might not be right away but it will happen.

I might not embrace failure but I am not so much bothered by being knocked down or falling down.

Maybe that was not the right path for me and I was being stubborn not seeing it so I am knocked down.

Or perhaps I am not on the right path and instead of admitting it , I wait til I fall down.



3 responses »

  1. I can feel so many of the things you’re saying.
    I thought I would be a great mother. Alas, I am *not* the mother that my mother was for me. I don’t cook. (I hate cooking. I’m on board with you there.) I tried stay-at-home motherhood and failed big-time. I’m one of those that has to work. That’s what works for me. It doesn’t work for everyone. Did I fail? No. I just don’t fit my own pre-conceived ideal. It just wasn’t meant to be.
    I’m fortunate to have an excellent relationship with my own mother. My husband and his mother, however, is horrible to watch. But it’s not his failure. Her role in the fiasco cannot be understated.
    We do our best. Sometimes it works. Sometimes it doesn’t. We learn. We move on.


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