It is really tiring.

Standard

Muscle aches…….no problem…..take a bath.

Joints hurt….no problem….Take a supplement, take arthritis meds.

Sleep disturbances…..no problem…there is a pill for that.

Fatigue…..no problem….drink an energy drink.

This is what people who don’t know think when they hear what we go through all day.  I have talked about how people with chronic illness/chronic pain need a “toolbox”. If you missed it…click https://chronicallysickmanicmother.wordpress.com/2013/03/04/chocolate-caffeine-and-just-a-tiny-bit-of-maniacal-laughing/

 What people don’t realize is…….you have to remember to mix up your toolbox. Even then it is just very tiring to always have to do something to just feel normal.

Its one thing when you deal with these things one at a time. Its another when two happen at one time, or all of the above and more.

The weird thing is you forget that there is something other than what you are currently using for relief. You get stuck in a rut. Every night the same things to relieve the pain. After awhile you realize your pain levels are rising again and you can’t figure out why.  My end of the day level is normally a seven.  I don’t worry until it is consistently two notches higher for more than a week.

Not only do you have these ruts that you get stuck in but women also have to deal with that time of the month. Even the easiest cycle is going to lower a woman’s over all feel good level.  When you add that on top of what you normally deal with. It ends up no good.  Sometimes I remember but not always. Sometimes I wonder why I am so incredibly  fatigued. Why my lower back hurts so much more today?  You would think taking the birth control pill every morning I would be aware of where I am in my cycle.  Several of my issues have mental fog and cognitive issues. There are times I can’t remember if I took my meds that morning if I don’t take them the same way the same time every day. Sleep in….I won’t remember if I took my meds that day.

This may not seem like a big deal until you realize you have to go through this for years. At first its not a big deal to change it up.  Its almost fun. Almost.

Then you have the plateaus where nothing really changes you just kinda maintain.  Out of nowhere something pops up. Is it a new symptom? a side effect that you had not previously had to a medication that all of a sudden starts? Its hard to know. Its frustrating. You go between wanting to know to not wanting to know. Just try to bandaid it and hope it goes away.

The most tiring to manage condition I have is IBS. It is also known as Irritable Bowel Syndrome . Lucky me I get both the constipation and the diarrhea.  Thats not all folks. I also have an intolerance to corn products.  So sometimes just having my IBS flare causes other things to flare.

Its not that I have muscle aches, joint pain, bathroom issues, back issues, sinus issues, nerve pain issues. It is the constant managing and trying to do more than just survive.

There have been people who have said, “But I saw you do this this and this. You were not too tired for that!”

Actually I probably was.  There comes a point where you just do things. It is like ignoring someone when they are being ignoring. It does not make them less annoying. Go away fatigue I am buzy being a mom.  I can’t think about how tired I am, I have a kid to raise.  And I DO want to raise her.

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2 responses »

  1. I absolutely understand what you are saying here. I also suffer from Chronic Pain, Fibromyalgia, Systemic Swelling due to an auto immune issue that effects the histamine receptors causing them to continuously produce histamine, Chronic PTSD, and other issues. I have heard things like:
    ” you are just being lazy. You just need to be more active that is your only problem. You take too many pills and see too many drs. You should really just try all natural remedies. How do you know for certain that you have this? You wouldn’t have this problem if you would just lose weight. ”
    There are a lot of times I just try to soldier through it but sometime around the past year some major things have changed and I seem to have lost my ability to do that most of the time. Glad to read your blog!

    Like

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