There is just something about the magic of Disney. Its really there. After all you only see Cinderella in real life for the first time once. It was THE thing my daughter wanted to see first.
The line was forever….but she wasn’t phased at all.
Seeing her face and the wonder and excitement.
I was asked several times : ” How are you going to afford that?” and “How are you going to do that?”
Yes I was in pain. Sometimes though the pain is just an afterthought.
Remembering my times at Disney as a kid. Watching her see it for the first time. Yeah just an afterthought. I knew I was going to hurt. It wasn’t enough to keep me from doing it.
As to affording it, well…its been planned. I know I am not one to be able to put money away. For this we did.
Laying in bed after a full day at Disney. I couldn’t sleep. Big surprise right? My medications were barely noticeable and the hot tub was beyond heaven. There was not a muscle that wasn’t throbbing, a joint that wasn’t tightening. I could have said the lines are too long and it will be too hot. See the problem with that, is I only know amusement parks in the middle of the summer. Every year that my family vacationed it was most of the time in the middle of the summer.
We took plenty of breaks….one time even just sitting by the greenery and feeding the ducks and chickadees that were all around. They knew where the good eats were!
The day after …..I have gotten about three hours of sleep which was actually more than I thought I would get. It hurts to move. I need to move. The longer I stay still the more I hurt when I do move. Medicating almost every two hours helps. It will take a few days to get back down to my baseline. I know this. I am good okay with this. I may groan, throw sarcasm around and generally just carry on.
Why? Why do I always forget its not the day after that gets me…..its the day after that. This is why I take so many pictures. This is my coping tool. I will go back through them. Edit them a bit. Play with them. Its a distraction technique I know. I did allow myself to sleep in. I did get up twice to medicate. It really drives me nuts that its true that if you lay in bed, the pain is worse. If you get up and move it helps. Its not gone. Its muted just a bit. Maybe its come down half a notch. So I write. I play with the pictures.
I try to eat helpful foods. Bananas, spinach and even some berries. I hydrate. When I think I have done enough hydrating I drink some more.
There are times that I wish I could just stop. Parenting doesn’t allow you to just stop. To just recover. Okay well maybe with the help of benedryl or some other equally sleep inducing medication.
Parenting while in chronic pain isn’t easy. I constantly tell my brain its wrong. I am not in that much pain. I can do this. I maybe moving a little slower today and tomorrow and probably the day after that too, but I will be moving.
Sometimes moving a little slower isn’t such a bad thing. I capture alot of great images this way. I saw frazzled mothers desperately shaking bottles, I saw mothers breastfeeding in the shade. I saw little toddlers ecstatic about the smallest little things. The sunlight glinting through green trees. The little chickadees anxious for the next droppings. Hot and tired parents trailing after excited kids. Things that I would have missed had I only been paying attention to where we were going next and not just staying present in the minute.
So in the end its all worth it. Its all about finding the things that make it worth it. There were many times that I was sure I was done. I couldn’t do anymore. Then she would catch site of something and we would be off again. I couldn’t stand to miss seeing her wonder. It was the magic of Disney that moved me along. Way past my limits. Way past even my max limits.
I hope when she looks back she will only see that I was there. I was present, We did things together. Not the pain or the frequent rests or the constant pill taking.
Also, there was a little bit of magic left over for mama from the Magic kingdom…..I lost two and half pounds that day!